Products That Should Probably Not Hit The Market: "His" and "Her" Cum-Towels

"His" and "Her" Cum-Towels

Products That Should Probably Not Hit The Market: "Ginger Band-Aids"

"Ginger Band-Aids"

 

Products That Should Probably Not Hit The Market

"Celebrity Parkinson's Bobbleheads"

 Half the proceeds will be donated in the help of finding the cure for Parkinson's disease. Ok, all of the Proceeds; geeeesh!

TOP 15 SEXIEST STAND-UP COMEDIANS

TOP 15 SEXIEST STAND-UP COMEDIANS

Good-looking and funny! These comedians are worthy of your laughs and your genitals.

#15- Amy Schumer

Ok, yeah I know, she is not model-material, but this comic has got some sex appeal. She actually cleans up pretty well. Amy concedes that if she was in a cheer-leading pyramid, she'd be the base. Hey, if she was good enough for Anthony Jeselnik for a couple of days, she's good enough for me and this List!

#14- Dane Cook

Dane is truly hated in the comic world now, and he gets no respect, but I do respect that he's a good-looking dude. He is in great shape; maybe even more so these days with all the down-time. Dane's been in comedy movies such as "Employee of the Month" and "Waiting."  




#13- Chris Hardwick  

Chicks love nerds, and this guy definitely owns the title of being one. Back in the 90's, he co-hosted a show with Jenny McCarthy called "Singled Out." These days you can see Chris hosting on the shows "@Midnight" and "Talking Dead."





#12- Kevin Hart

Kevin may cum in 20 to 23 seconds, but he still pulls the chicks.    5' 2" if you like your guys short and funny, ladies. He has recently been in films such as "Grudge Match" and "Ride Along." Expect to see a lot more of this funny guy!

#11- Nikki Glaser

Nikki is all kinds of adorable. Rumor has it, she gave up drinking alcohol, but WE do not need to have beer goggles on to see this girl is hot. Nikki is 5' 9", so apparently her legs end, but they seem to go forever if you ask me. She currently has a show on MTV called "Nikki & Sara LIVE".  Watch it!






#10- John Mulaney


Yes ladies, John Mulaney is legal, (That'd be inappropriate for the list if he wasn't legal) he just looks like he is 16-years-old.  He's got some style, and he is smart (Georgetown grad.); what more do you want? Oh yeah, he's freaking hilarious: triple-threat guy. You can see him on his new show "Mulaney" on Fox.





# 9- Sarah Silverman

Sarah Silverman, she's My favorite SS since the WWII guys. Speaking of Jews... this is one cute Hebrew; oy vey! Her shtick is that she looks sweet and innocent, but the things that come out of her mouth will make your jaw drop. Her prank parody song on ex-boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel, "F*@#ing Matt Damon"  is her greatest gag.






# 8- Whitney Cummings

A "Cumming" pun inserted here; how dare you? I love Whitney! She dresses down in her stand-up act so you can pay attention to her comedy, but she looks great in a dress. Whitney co-starred in the sitcom "Whitney" with #7 on the the List, Chris D'Elia. The show was cancelled, but she's at least back doing the stand-up circuit again.






# 7- Chris D'Elia

Chris D'Elia, AKA Chank Smith (rapper alias), is a Los Angeles-based stand-up comic, actor, writer, and rapper. He played the loveable boyfriend of Whitney Cummings on the sitcom "Whitney." Chris rocks the scruffy look; you know the look; a 3-day beard, greasy-looking long hair, and the appearance like he may not have showered in awhile: that look that girls absolutely love. Hence, he is on the List. 





# 6- Aisha Tyler


At first you might think, "This girl looks like a model, there is no way she's funny!"  First of all, quit assuming their is an inverse relationship between how good looking a girl comic is, and how funny she is! Have you not learned anything from this List? Beautiful girls can be funny too. Second, Aisha is one of the most talented comedians out there. She currently does the voice of Lana Kane on Archer.  Her Character Lana looks just like her, but cartoon-hot!






# 5- Natasha Leggero
 

Natasha is an adorable, petite, stand-up comedian of Italian descent that I can't get enough of. Her comedy career has been very versatile. She kills it in the Comedy Central Roasts, and she has so many cameo's on comedy shows they should have a filmography page. (Oh yeah, they do.) You can see Natasha doing comedy and looking sexy in a hot tub  on "Tubbin' With Tash."





# 4- Anjelah Johnson

How about the comedian who can do sketch comedy and was also a former Oakland Raiderette cheerleader?; Ya, she is making the List! Anjelah Johnson is hot as she is funny.  She gained notoriety as a cast member on MADtv (13th season) and for her spot-on impersonation of a Vietnamese nail salon employee in her stand-up act. How about we do the cheering for you now, Anjelah!





# 3- Anthony Jeselnik

Tall, dark humor, and handsome: Anthony is a cocky son-of-a-bitch and has the skills and charm to back it up. Anthony is one of the "it" comedians right now. He has wrote for "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon" and the "Comedy Central Roasts."  He performed during the Donald Trump Roast and blew up soon after. You can enjoy his dark humor on "The Jeselnik Offensive" on Comedy Central.

# 2- Iliza Shlesinger

Ummm, just look left at her picture. Do I really have to say much? "Sexiest comedians" List; how about "Sexiest humans" List?!? She also has brains; Iliza graduated from college with a degree in film. Are you intimidated yet, gentleman?  Shlesinger became the first female winner of NBC's Last Comic Standing  during the show's sixth season.












# 1- Daniel Tosh

Tosh #1, why? I don't get it either, but chicks love this guy. He has a body that looks out of shape, but he's weirdly athletic; he was receding, but apparently the Propecha has worked; He's not tan or buff; He acts really gay, but pulls gorgeous women; I guess being the best comedian on tv may have something to do with it! Na-na, na-na, boo-boo, we'll just stick our heads in doo-doo: You win #1 Daniel Tosh!

Liam Lynch: "Wilkinson's Family Restaurant" commercial and "United States of Whatever"

Liam Lynch, real name William Patrick Niederst, is a punk rock/comedy rock artist from Virginia. He is definitely one of my favorite comic musicians. I could go on, but Whateva!

"United States of Whatever"

 "Wilkinson's Family Restaurant"

Funny sayings on T-shirts by Noah Burke

Why not let everyone know how much of an A-hole you are by wearing one of these shirts!

Purchase a "Morals Shmorals" T-shirt at this link:

www.ebay.com/Morals-Shmorals

I do the "Light's Out" dance on the news

"Light's out" Dance- Shawne Merriman of the San Diego Chargers had a celebration dance after he made a QB sack or another great play. The Chargers had a rally at The House of Blues in downtown San Diego to get the fans ready for the big playoff game against the Denver Broncos. I was one of three people to get on stage and do Merriman's celebration dance.

Me on Jay Leno, ahhhhh Kinda!

 "Me on Jay Leno"- In 2004 I gave a quote in a local San Diego weekly magazine called The Reader. I give my opinion on dating girls with Big jugs and the importance of girls needing to have the ability to read.

Season 13 Episode 2825
2825 - MICHAEL MOORE, FELICITY HUFFMAN, BRUCE HORNSBY 11:34/10:34pm 11/29/04

Guests include filmmaker Michael Moore, actress Felicity Huffman and music by Bruce Hornsby. TV-14

Original version:

                                         


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